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April 16, 2010
Someone from Wauzeka, WI writes:
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Dad's who pay unfair amounts of child support becuase the mother does not work are left being punished over and over. They do not have their children or see them daily but pay large amounts of support to not see them. The mother usually has custody and she is awarded, rewarded, for this? It is not right at all! The father has lost their child/children, lost the home they had if married, then heap on top of that the huge loss, the punishment of only seeing their kids part time, add to that child support and the fathers are left not even having enough money to pay rent on a one bedroom appartment to live in, let alone buy food to eat, pay for gas to get to their job to pay the support to the mother of their kid(s). Is it any wonder they feel they have lost eveything? They have! The mom is allowed to get all kinds of help, rent assistance, food stamps, heat assitance and who knows what else- the father, no such help for him, not any kind of help for him. He has to count the child support he pays as his income- it is not right for these dad's at all, it is unfair to them. Supporting their children is fine, but be reasonable- the mom should have to pay he same as the dad does- if he is paying $300 a month in support for 1 child, the mom should be made to pay that much too or courts should split it- say each parent pays toward that child $150 a month. I know plenty of mom's who sit and do not work, just collect child support from the poor man who is soon to be living in his car (if he even has one) while she does nothing, has no reason to work, she gets all kinds of help, he starves. How in this country is that fair or right or just? Yes, if the mom has (and usually does) primary custody she is responsible for the day to day care of the children, but it's not right for them to sit home, not work while the fathers who would love to have their children more, see them more just are told to pay, pay and pay more. If they can't make the payments they are called dead beats- it is not always true. Most of them just cannot afford the support payment they have been told to pay- they can't afford rent or food for themselves. I have watched my sons suffer and go deeper in the hole while working a full time 40 hr a week job because of child support being so high for them and I have had to sit and watch them suffer, not see their kids, be hurt, depressed and feel bad because they can't make ends meet. These unfair laws need to be changed. Fathers need to stop being punished if they are not the ones with their child/children living with them - they are punished just by not having their child daily. There needs to be some help for the dads too, not just the moms. Maybe if the fathers did not have to pay so much support but had their kids more of the time it would be better, maybe more of the moms would get up and get a job to help support their own children too.
April 17, 2010
Someone from Hopkinton, IA writes:
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I SUPPORT THIS IN FACT THEY SHOULD CONSIDER THAT THE FEMALES MAKE AT LEAST MIN WADGE WHEN CALCULATING CHILD SUPPORT I PAY OUT SO MUCH I CANT AFFORD TO LIVE AND BARELY MAKE IT TO WORK EVERY DAY BECOUSE THE CALCULATIONS ARE SO UNFAIR AFTER WORKIN 48 HOURS A WEEK I BRING HOME $150 HOW ARE WE SUPOSE TO LIVE BUT THEY DONT SEEM TO CARE ABOUT THAT
April 17, 2010
Someone from Grundy Center, IA writes:
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I was a single mother. I left my husband when our youngest was just 9 months old due to infidelity. However, I do believe that the system today is too out of balance. It attachs fathers for being fathers. And holds them 100% accountable financially. Often times, if there are three children involved Fathers pay $900 monthly in child support. Now if you make 500,000 maybe thats not a problem. But where I come from most men make $10.00 an hour and can not afford rent, utilities, or even food for themselves. And there is no system in place which looks at income for fathers. This causes undue stress on fathers who want to be responsible but find it impossible. Some even turning to living on the streets. We HAVE to do something with these laws... We are mistreating our young men who want to be fathers and responsible but are abused by this system. I am a retired Licensed Master Social Worker... it is time for us to advocate for your sons so they can have equal time, payments and fun with their children.
April 17, 2010
Someone from Grundy Center, IA signed.
April 18, 2010
Someone from Wauzeka, WI writes:
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The only people that realize the inequality of the support structure are the ones that have had to pay or the realatives of the one who has to pay. The ones that recieve the money think it is all just fine. I've been married and divorced twice and it was 20 years in between divorces. In that time there was so much equality in the work place for women/men and equal rights but when it came to divorce it was still the same arcadic rules and regulations that it always was. Things need to be changed.
6 years ago
Someone from Thomas, WV signed.
6 years ago
Someone from Sevierville, TN writes:
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I just want to say that child support laws are crap, I don't get why the father has to pay for health care, for court cost, and way to much money when we got live also for mother sit on her ass. It takes 2 to make a child, The father gets screwed over, The woman have more options to control getting pregnant, patches, shots, pills, inserts. So many controls for it, but we get the blame its bs. What do we have, get your nuts clip or condems. I think with mothers having more option to control it they should be held little more responsible. God knows if there was pill for me to take or a patch a shot. I damn sure be using it if I didnt want kids.
6 years ago
Someone from Bronx, NY writes:
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I'm a loving caring father, who did evrything in my power to keep a struggling relationship tohether, I was fed up and finally stopped trying with my sons mom, I went for joint custody of my son because of my sons mother ocassional refusal to let me see my child, now she wants to take me to child support out of spite! I give her $80.00 every week in checks, plus what I do for my boy on my own ,but she wants to cripple me in court, the system is used by as. A weapon by some women and it a shame, because men are treated unfairly by the courts, men don't mind paying child support, as long as its reasonable, not unaffordable,
just now
Someone from Bronx, NY writes:
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I'm a loving caring father, who did evrything in my power to keep a struggling relationship tohether, I was fed up and finally stopped trying with my sons mom, I went for joint custody of my son because of my sons mother ocassional refusal to let me see my child, now she wants to take me to child support out of spite! I give her $80.00 every week in checks, plus what I do for my boy on my own ,but she wants to cripple me in court, the system is used by as. A weapon by some women and it a shame, because men are treated unfairly by the courts, men don't mind paying child support, as long as its reasonable, not unaffordable,
6 years ago
Someone from Bronx, NY writes:
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I'm a loving caring father, who did evrything in my power to keep a struggling relationship tohether, I was fed up and finally stopped trying with my sons mom, I went for joint custody of my son because of my sons mother ocassional refusal to let me see my child, now she wants to take me to child support out of spite! I give her $80.00 every week in checks, plus what I do for my boy on my own ,but she wants to cripple me in court, the system is used by as. A weapon by some women and it a shame, because men are treated unfairly by the courts, men don't mind paying child support, as long as its reasonable, not unaffordable,
6 years ago
Someone from Bronx, NY writes:
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I'm a loving caring father, who did evrything in my power to keep a struggling relationship tohether, I was fed up and finally stopped trying with my sons mom, I went for joint custody of my son because of my sons mother ocassional refusal to let me see my child, now she wants to take me to child support out of spite! I give her $80.00 every week in checks, plus what I do for my boy on my own ,but she wants to cripple me in court, the system is used by as. A weapon by some women and it a shame, because men are treated unfairly by the courts, men don't mind paying child support, as long as its reasonable, not unaffordable,
April 27, 2010
Someone from Denver, CO writes:
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Things that are wrong with the system: % amount awarded to custodial parent. Why is a % taken from my paycheck and not the actual amount that is needed? Change it so Custodial parents are allowed to claim ever other month on child tax credits and daycare credit Make visit days as important as the money and throw the custodial parent in jail if they repeatedly fail to allow the non-custodial parent visitation if in the decree Make all custodial parents accountable for the money that is spent on the child. Please consider the tx break that the custodial parent fails to receive either in allowing them to claim the child every other year or deduct this from the support order Both parents need to be financially responsible for the child
April 28, 2010
Someone from Cleveland, OH writes:
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5 kids 3 on clid support 2 with my wife. first! i got a job but couldnt start because cs took my licence so i told them i have a job but need my l's i even had the manager talk to the worker (which was will mean for no reason) saying he got the job he can start as soon as you (cs) release his l's she said he will get them when he pay 540 dollars wow! i begged this chic still no so my manager told i have 4 days or will hirer someone else, so i had to run around borrowing money to pay cs to get a job.now that i have it they got me again225 for child support 170 for me and my other two kids, and didnt even know they were going to take they just up my payments.dont mind paying but it is so so unfair and one sided
April 29, 2010
Someone from Peachtree City, GA writes:
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I currently have a torn ACL & I'm now 3 mnths behind. I offered my tax return of $2k. She had me served with court papers showing $20k behind??? I already paid $7k in a lump sum this past Dec & a total of $16k last year. I only got to see them for 6 hrs and I was paid up then. I have a WC claim that will prob take mnths if not yrs. What do I do now?? Will I go to jail for being hurt on the job because I have 2 boys I love tremdously with a women(ex-wife) that refuses to get a job.
April 30, 2010
Someone from Philadelphia, PA writes:
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Somethings needs to be done about this system. Too many mothers using their children as a paycheck. Fathers forced to watch their children be neglected while the mother spends all his hard earned income on herself. It's a disgrace! These fathers are left with nothing to live off of. They can't get any type of government assistance because everything looks at their gross income. Some of the fathers in this country get so screwed by this system while the mothers just keep having babies sitting back collecting childsupport & welfare & don't even take proper care of their children.
May 4, 2010
Someone from Luck, WI signed.
May 5, 2010
Someone from Midlothian, VA writes:
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I think it really unfair to some fathers who are paying child support and health insurance already. Then child enforcement comes in and does a modifications on the child support because they want the arrears taken care of when there is already a court order for arrears put in place. Health insurance for two kids is very expensive and along with child support it lives the man without any money to support himself. Then they talk about deadbeat dads/mom, what does the law expect when they take all the income from the non-custodial parent. The law is causing the problem by taking all the income that the other parent can't afford to live himself. Its very unfair to the parent who is doing what they are suppose but get screwed in the end that they become deadbeat dads.
just now
Someone from Bon Wier, TX signed.
May 18, 2010
Someone from Aptos, CA writes:
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The government should stick to what they have written. And change things to make them moral.
May 28, 2010
Someone from Marinette, WI writes:
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My friends child was born when he was 17 - still in high school. Since then he has had to pay 17% of his earnings in child support. Because the mother of his child is a 'single mom' she gets state aid. She gets her housing paid for, food stamps, & is getting her college paid for. On top of the $340.00 a month she gets in child support. The father has never had the option of going to college - how could he afford it? He gets no help offered to him from the state, why does she? He can not afford to live. He has been poor for the past 10 years. He has always had a job & paid support, He makes $12.45 an hour (not much but college was never an option) Rent for a small 2bdrm is $500.00 a month Insurance that he is forced to have or he will go to jail, is $200.00 a month. The mother just moved his kid 120 miles away from him, without notice, which is legal because its less than 150 miles & in the same state. So gas to travel there will be around $100.00 a month. He takes home $1,532 after taxes. The cost of support,insurance,rent& gas to get to his child is $1,140. This leaves him with $392.00 a month for everything else a person needs to survive. How is this fair? Why do the good fathers get punished? Why do single moms who get child support get state help? Only the single moms who TRULY have a "dead beat dad" that do not receive support should get state help. The laws need to change! This is America and the laws are messed up. I feel for all you fathers who are doing the right thing - even though that means you live at the poverty level. But what choice do you really have? Live like a bum or become a felon for not paying enough money in support.
June 13, 2010
Someone from Newton, IA signed.
6 years ago
Someone from Norwalk, WI signed.
June 27, 2010
Someone from Richmond, VA writes:
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I find it very upsetting that the Child support laws are so unfair towards NC parents and their second families as well. Child support is supposed to be for the child, but it also ends up taking away from the non custodial parent's other children they may have because of the extravagant amounts that some are made to pay. It is also unfair when the custodial parent doesn't WANT to work (not because of illness or no available child care, but just plain laziness) and in turn, it raises the non custodial parents payments because the custodial parent doesn't feel the need to have to help pay for their child's needs, they feel it should all be on the NC parent. Is there anyway to get Congress to take a serious look into this because it can also end up causing the breakdown of many families that COULD have stayed together had it not been for the financial struggles that were made from higher child support payments. Children are the main concern here but not all children are taken into consideration. Example being, should a second child suffer having a house foreclosed on because the father has child support payments to make to another child, and that takes away from his ability to pay for a roof over his second child's head? Is the first child's life and well being more valuable than the second child's life and well being? Lots of people say that is like asking the first mother to take a cut in her pay because he has another child after the first one, but the current laws are basically forcing the second mothers to take a cut in finances for supporting their children because the first mother isn't with the father and I guess the courts figure since the other parent is single they need more help, which is a completely unfair and untrue assesment. And on another note, since child support is supposed to be for the child, why is it that states keep such close records of the NC parent's jobs and financial records, but they aren't requiring the custodial parents to show proof and documentation of what they use child support money for? If it is all supposed to go towards the children, then there should be no problem showing documentation right?
June 29, 2010
Someone from Washington, NC writes:
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I lost my job... The IRS understands and works with me. Child Support DOES NOT CARE! My order stayed the same and payments are still expected! They are THE most unfair and inconsiderate oganization in existence! It's rediculous!!!!!
July 2, 2010
Someone from Macedon, NY writes:
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Its just another way for the "other" parent to controll you. I have been on both sides of the coin and there is no fairness for the parent having to pay. And pay for what? If the parent who has physical residencey don't you think they should be able to show they can provide the same amount of money per week. This child support law is stupid and does nothing but cause chaos for the parents and for the other parent struggling to provide just as well for the child when they come over for visitation or are you a babysitter on the weekends so the other parent can go **** the money away and then say I am broke.
just now
Someone from New York, NY signed.
July 16, 2010
Someone from Olivehurst, CA signed.
July 29, 2010
Someone from Missoula, MT writes:
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We just found out my husband's daughter's mother has convinced a man on the Blackfeet reservation that the same child is his, he signed a paternity acknowledgement and is now paying her child support in addition to my husband paying her $393 per month. What do I do????
August 3, 2010
Someone from Missouri City, TX signed.
August 3, 2010
Someone from Missouri City, TX writes:
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I married a man with four children who he loves dearly he has always been the sole support of his children. The kids moms dont work the sit on welfare and section 8 and wait for his check spending it on the men in their life and not his kids but on the other guys kids.we have no money to do activities when the kids come over. We can barely feed everybody. I love my husband but im sick of his kids mom.Im not feeling very Christian like right now.
August 4, 2010
Someone from Charlotte, NC signed.
August 5, 2010
Someone from Florence, SC signed.
August 5, 2010
Someone from Stuarts Draft, VA signed.
August 6, 2010
Someone from Fayetteville, NC signed.
August 11, 2010
Someone from Almond, NY writes:
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In a time of equal opportunity employment equal rights and equal pay for equal work. How is it right that I pay support for my children. When they stay with me 50% of the time. I pay thier insurance co pay on premiums and life insuriance on one all of thier school lunches and I buy thier school clothes.My exwife makes as much as I do and I cant even claim one on taxes
6 years ago
Someone from Charlotte, NC signed.
6 years ago
Someone from Tustin, CA writes:
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I'm paying 806.00 moth for a Kidd I new nothing about till he was 14 and because I live in CA were 70k a year is not that much , I am paying NC pay standard while his mom sits at home and collects state help.....wow 806.00 a month in NC pays the rent and car payment as well as food .......
6 years ago
Someone from Wilmington, DE signed.
August 27, 2010
Someone from Sumter, SC signed.
August 29, 2010
Someone from Springfield, MO signed.